How to Know If You're a Workaholic
Photo by Clark Tibbs on Unsplash
Many people assume the easiest way to spot a workaholic is by looking at how many hours they work. In my experience coaching founders and senior leaders, that’s rarely the best indicator. A better question lies beneath the behavior.
It’s tricky as startup founders and leaders. When you’re responsible for an entire organization, work naturally occupies more of your mind than it does for most people. The sense of responsibility is real.
Having been in those shoes myself as a co-founder—checking dashboards impulsively every now and then, even on weekends—I know the solution isn’t as straightforward as simply “switching off.” You may genuinely want to disconnect, yet still find yourself unable to.
I generally like to start with two questions:
What’s causing you to ask or wonder about this?
How does your body feel while you’re working?
The first helps us look at the behaviors, actions, and observations around your work. The second helps us understand the mindset driving those behaviors.
The term workaholic was coined in 1971 by psychologist Wayne E. Oates, who described it as “an uncontrollable need to work incessantly.” He viewed it as an addiction because work can become an escape, a way to avoid experiencing uncomfortable feelings or situations in the present. (Granted, it’s a healthier addiction than drinking or drugs. Others may escape through binge-watching or online shopping instead.)
If you’re curious, there’s a short workaholism self-check at the end of this letter.
There’s a compulsive need to work and think about work constantly, accompanied by guilt, restlessness, or even fear when not working.
Workaholism often goes hand in hand with working long hours, but the two are distinct. Working long hours doesn’t automatically make you a workaholic. Sometimes your role genuinely demands it, and those longer hours aren’t driven by compulsion.
I’ve worked with leaders who put in exceptionally long hours because they’d taken on a new charter or were preparing for an IPO. They worked intensely, but they also knew they could switch off when needed. They would consciously reclaim that time on weekends or once they were back home.
Now, most of my clients are smart enough to find a rational explanation for why they’re working long hours, or to say that work is simply their passion. That’s where the second question becomes particularly useful.
Have you ever been deeply passionate about an activity? Something you enjoyed so much that you wanted to spend hours doing it?
How did that feel in your body?
The answer is usually a word that describes expansiveness: feeling lighter, taller, energized, your chest opening up, being in flow. Your body generally feels expansive.
Now compare that with doing something because there’s striving, pressure, or a strong urge to keep going. There’s more effort involved, and effort often brings contraction in the body—tight muscles, a clenched jaw, closed fists, hunched shoulders.
A compulsion creates contraction.
Passion creates expansiveness.
So perhaps the better question isn’t simply, “Am I working too much?”
It’s:
Can you switch off if you want to?
There’s one more nuance here.
If the answer is, “Yes, but I really don’t want to,” that could still come from either a contracted state (denial about workaholism) or an expansive state (because you genuinely enjoy your work).
That’s when I bring up one more point: building systematic breaks into your life.
Breaks create space for insight.
Our best ideas often come when we’re not trying. Whether it’s during a walk, in the shower, or while daydreaming, your brain continues working in the background. Breaks also give you a chance to zoom out and ask whether you’re solving the right problem in the right way.
Read more here:
How taking better breaks can improve your focus & productivity
Also read: Why work-life balance is a myth.
If you’re curious about working together, you can learn more about my coaching here.
