How to Keep Going When Life Feels Uncertain
Photo by Martin Marek on Unsplash
I was talking to a friend recently about a personal issue that had many moving parts. I had originally called her to brainstorm, and once we wrapped up, she asked how I was doing.
I shared the facts matter-of-factly, adding that it was frustrating at times, but much of it was outside my control. After listening, she told me how commendable she found the way I was handling so much uncertainty.
Her words immediately took me back to a memory where I had felt the same about her — that she deals with uncertainty so gracefully, and I had wished I could do the same. (We often joke that we’re part of a mutual admiration club!)
As I reflected, I realized something: we often admire how others handle difficult situations because we’re not the ones in them. From the outside, we can’t imagine how we’d cope.
And the truth is — there’s really no way to prepare fully for uncertainty. All we can rely on in the moment is our resilience, grit, emotional regulation, and sheer willpower. But how can we ever be sure that that will be enough? We can’t.
Yet, if we pause and look back, every one of us has faced situations we once thought we couldn’t handle — and still, somehow, we did. It may not have been smooth sailing, but we found the strength, wisdom, and resilience to get through.
I remember asking my therapist something similar after a major incident in my life. Things had eventually worked out the way I wanted, but afterward, I felt unexpectedly depressed and depleted. I couldn’t understand why — I had been doing better in the midst of the action, so why did I feel worse now?
She explained: when we’re in the middle of a “war-like” or “danger” situation, our body and mind do everything possible to help us cope, drawing on every reserve of energy. But once the immediate danger passes, that’s when the body allows itself to collapse or break down.
That made so much sense. Since then, I’ve felt in awe of what our human body and mind are capable of. It’s become a reminder to myself: whatever the situation, I can rely on my body to do its best. It may not be perfect by some external standard, but together, my body and I can figure things out along the way. We will learn and adapt.
If you think about it, our discomfort with uncertainty often comes from our need to control outcomes. When things don’t unfold the way we want — or when we don’t know enough to feel in control — that’s what makes uncertainty hard to live with.
In such times, I turn to the Serenity Prayer:
”Dear God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.”
And sometimes, all we can really do is keep moving with the flow, trusting that things will fall into place when they’re meant to.
👉 What’s one situation where you can take a tiny step forward, despite the uncertainty?
✨ Periods of uncertainty can feel overwhelming — but you don’t have to go through them alone. If you’re curious about how coaching could help you find clarity and direction, let’s start a conversation. Reach out to me at isha@ishasingla.com
